Yes, it's that time again. Another year rolled. Yet here I sit, still agent-less, and it absolutely has an affect on my attitude, on my perseverance. Just like water wears away stone, it's always in the back of my mind that no agents have found my work worth representing, but I am fighting to remain positive about my writing skills.
So the only resolution I have for 2013 is to enjoy myself, and that includes writing. I don't have enough time left in my life to make myself miserable over someone else's opinion. I have so many things to appreciate, to be happy about, that fretting about not having an agent isn't something on which I want to waste my time.
Here are some of the truly important things in my life:
(1) I have wonderful friends, supportive and generous friends, and I like most of my co-workers. Sure, every company has its share of assholes, so most is a good thing. Most of my friends are from work.
(2) And then there's my family. I love them, even my mother, and they love me, even my mother. Like my friends, they're supportive and generous.
(3) I have a loving pet, my cat, BlackBeary; although at her age, her medical bills are also putting a dent in (4). I love her so much. She sleeps beside me every night, and no matter how late I sleep in, she doesn't wake me up in the morning for her breakfast. But she does get insistent once I'm up. Meow. Meow. Meow. Breakfast. Breakfast. Breakfast. Every morning she runs down the hall ahead of me, constantly looking back to make sure that I'm right behind her, just in case I forget how to get to the kitchen.
(4) I have a good salary, one such that I'm not living from paycheck to paycheck, like I used to when I was married, but that's a story for another day.
(5) I have good health, and dental, even though my part of the implant work (oral surgery) I had done on the 21st is putting a huge dent in (4) right now. I have health insurance, which many people in our country do not.
(6) I was finally able to make my pilgrimage to Scotland in 2012, something I've dreamed of for years. And my brother was able to go with me.
(7) I have a job I don't hate, a secure job. I'm intelligent, financially secure, a good cook, a good friend, a good guest. I'm happy and confident, mostly.
And I'm a good writer.
With that said, there are a ton of good things about my life that I didn't list, that I don't think about until they happen, but it's a good life. Published author or not, I've got a good life.
And I will be published. I just need to be patient.